Author: Joseph

Even Heaven Knows How Bad the Vikings Screwed Up – Selah in Heaven

What if our loved ones can see us everyday? What if we are still their heroes? Biblically, I know that those who have passed really can’t look down on us, but that doesn’t change the fact that I want them to be proud of me. I have a Grandmother who taught me what family is. I have an Uncle who taught me the power of God. And I have Selah who I’d still like to make an impression on, to be a father to her in some way.

We All Love Cat Videos – But They’re a Lie! – – – The True Cat Story

  Wife Watch 2018: It’s getting to the point where I am going to push her. In order to save everyone’s lives from the coming apocalypse and impending doom from her throwing the world off its axis, I’m just going to knock her down. You can thank me later while leading your peaceful lives. This has been a Wife Watch Update.     My wife is one of those really soft hearted people… to everyone but me that is. When she sees an animal on the street, suddenly it has a new home. Occasionally this does not turn out the way that you’d expect it to. Not everyone wants rescued. In our younger years, we found one of those situations. With our first child, we had plenty of visits to the ER. New parents tend to freak out over the smallest things, like… having his head dented. (We were told it was nothing to worry about. Happens all the time.) Through these visits, we became friends with one of the on site doctors. This doctor also had a soft spot for animals, but not the time to spend on one with all the working hours that doctors have. There was...

It’s Time for Parents to Get Serious About the Lives of Their Children

  I’m going to do something I don’t normally do with you. I know. I know. Stick to what you know! We do not like change! Booo! Just bare with me okay? I’m sticking to something I know with this. It’s just a part of myself I haven’t really shared with you. I’ve let it slip through the cracks of my posts before. Gave you a little glimpse at the real me. My life is chaotic. I am a goofball. A lot of the times I don’t take things seriously. But here is what I do take seriously. I am a believer and follower of Christ. I believe in a personal relationship with Him. As a parent, I am trying to raise my kids to get to know Him as well. Whether you are a believer or not, you will agree with me that raising kids in this day and age is one of the most challenging feats a person can face. Everyone has specific values and morals they would like to instill in their children from the Muslim, Jewish, Christian, Buddhist, and Atheist. We all want our kids to become successful and productive members of society. Let me direct...

An Interesting Take on Being Fat and Weight Loss – Curious Much?

You guys have been reading for quite a while now, or maybe you’re just starting. Heck I don’t know. I can’t see everyone who is looking at my stuff. You could be aliens for all I know. Hello there little green man reading my blog! Tell all your little jibblets I say, “hi!” Sorry. Lost my train of thought. I wanted to let you in on a little secret. I’m absolutely fat. As a matter of fact, the medical community titles me as morbidly obese. I’m not the, My 600lb Life fat, but I am definitely the, “Hey, are you going to finish that donut?” fat. It’s a gross sight to see. Please avert your eyes if you have a weak stomach. The following image is not suitable for the faint of heart. Ugh… That makes me shudder with a bit of a bile favor in my mouth. The image you see above is of a 352lb man. I’m not that man anymore. I’ve began a health journey as of 2 months ago. My weight as of this morning is 326lb. I’ve dropped a whole toddler. It’s a miracle! I’m the first man ever to have taken a toddler from...

Can You Get Grounded in Heaven? – Selah in Heaven

Her short life here on earth was a very vocal one. Already at 6 months of age, she had developed her opinion, and began to show her prissy nature. If you walked by her without acknowledging her royal highness’ existence, she would literally yell at you. Once you looked, the biggest smile would spread across her face. I believe that God may have His hands full with this one.

Always be Prepared to Punch a Raccoon in the Nose

Before we get started, a brief update on Wife Watch 2018: It still hasn’t happened. We received a large snow last night. She has skidded a few times, but as not went down. Thus has been a brief Wife Watch update. Anybody who knows me knows that I’m a city slicker through and through. I was raised with technology and all the amenities that comes with not having to rough it out in the rural life. My dream job is office work, and I barely know how to change a tire on my own car. And yes, my hands are very soft and velvety thank you very much. My wife on the other hand was raised in backwoods Arkansas. Her grandpa (who was also her guardian) was a farmer. She road in the back of pick-up trucks that traveled 80 MPH down a gravel road. Her hands…. not so velvety. She brought to our marriage one of her traditions. Camping. I’m the type of person that, if I’m going to do something, I’m going to do it right. So, even though I dreaded the prospect of the great out doors, I demanded that we only use a tent with little...

Wife Watch – Winter Edition

Every year it happens at least once. If you know my wife, you know she is absolutely prone to acts of misforntune. I don’t know why. It’s just the way of the world. Have you ever read the Series of Unfortunate Events? Yeah, she’s the 4th, unnamed Boudelaire child. I have come to accept a theory. The reason she is the recipient of so many mishaps and mayhem is as a scapegoat for the rest of us. We live luckier lives thanks to her sacrifice. What is it that happens at least once a year you might ask? When Winter reaches its nastiest peak, she finds that one spot of ice that we all missed, and face plants. Now… I’m not saying it’s funny or anything, but… who am I kidding? I laugh so hard, I nearly lose my own balance. Let me give you a short example. Our very first winter together was a really nasty one. I had yet to discover my wife was a misfortune magnet. We left our vehicle to go inside. My legs are longer than hers, so I am used to arriving to my destination a couple moments earlier. I sat down in my...

New Friend – Selah in Heaven

What are the chances? Our loved ones exploring Heaven, and bumping into the loved one of our friends down here on earth. Would they hit it off? Surely. My friend over at Drop in the Bucket has a loved one who has gone before. I like to think that maybe my daughter and his are hitting it off as we speak. Especially over their love of bows.

Is That You, Mr. Claus? – Selah in Heaven

Christmas is coming soon! From the time this is being written, we have 10 days left. I wonder if St Nicholas knew that his work here on earth would lead to the formation of our modern day Santa Claus. I’m thankful for all the great things he did, but I am even more thankful for the spark of imagination he has struck in the minds of children everywhere. Selah may not get to celebrate with us; however, she can meet the man who started it all for herself. Speaking of Christmas, ***Affiliate Links to Follow*** I was given a great opportunity by a pretty cool affiliate to help increase the imagination of my children. There’s this program called Package from Santa. They have the works. Your child is given a customized letter, phone call, and video message from Santa himself as well as autographed images. I could review this completely for you, but I have a better idea. I’ll show you what it made happen. My youngest daughter has been having issues with her attitude lately. There was an option on the personalized letter to choose that your child has been naughty. This video is the result. My little girl...